So, what’s it like to be married to a figure competitor? That’s a very complicated question that has a lot of answers. Obviously, Mere looks amazing. But, it’s not all hot wife and rainbows in figure competitor husband land.

First, this is a very, very expensive sport. Mere’s suit was $750. Personal training and coaching is over $1,000 so far. Weekly food bills are more than they used to be (admittedly, much of the increase rests on my shoulders – I have to eat a lot). Supplements get expensive fast, especially when two of you are taking them. Then, there is the cost of the show itself and the expenditures related to it – tanning, hotel, hair and makeup, etc. All in, we’ve probably spent $4,000+ on “fitness” and contest related stuff in the last six months. While I’m sure that it’s possible to do it for less (I have the attitude that if you’re going to do something, do it the best way that you can), you will probably have to make sacrifices in order to compete. But, some of the money that we’ve spent of fitness stuff has been offset by money that we aren’t spending on other things.

This brings me to a point that will likely kill many competition dreams and cause strain on relationships if only one person in the family lives the fitness lifestyle. During prep mode, Mere and I can’t really go on dates. Sure, she gets the occasional cheat meal, but we can’t just pop down to our favorite bar on a Tuesday night after an especially bad day at the office and have a beer to let off some steam. Sure, I could go by myself, or with friends, but I love spending time with my wife (even if it’s at the gym or chilling watching Netflix at home), so I don’t. Plus, I see it as part of my job to support her in her competition journey – to me, that means that I don’t drink when she can’t and that we generally have the same diet (obviously, I eat more – and I get some cheat meals (my coach’s orders!). If I didn’t live a fitness oriented lifestyle all of the restrictions on Mere’s diet would be really, really hard for me to deal with.

As far as spending time together is concerned, our options are pretty limited due to workout requirements and meal times. We see each other at the gym almost every day (sometimes she goes earlier than me or later than me because of work schedules), but we don’t always train together. If our routines for the day happen to overlap we’ll certainly workout together, and we’re always available to spot each other, but some days seeing each other at the gym is as quick as a peck on the cheek and waving to each other between sets. Other than gym time, we tend to spend time together watching Netflix and movies or playing board games or video games at home – going out is hard because of the temptations, and because we have to schedule everything based on who needs to eat what when (we both tend to eat six days a week). Plus, during prep mode, she has posing class during the middle of the day on Saturday, so even weekends have to be scheduled.

Jealousy could also be a really big issue if you’re prone to it. Mere looks great, and that draws a lot of attention, especially at the gym when she’s in full beast mode. She always has someone complementing her or trying to flirt with her. It doesn’t really bother me though – we’ve been married for almost nine years now and I think we have one of the most tender, loving, honest relationships any two people could have. However, if you are prone to jealousy, you need to go into this with your eyes wide open – if your husband or wife decides to compete, they will draw attention to themselves and that’s something that you need to be prepared for.

If you’ve made it this far, you probably think that I hate this sport and that I don’t want my wife to compete. But, nothing could be further from the truth. Sure, there are parts of the sport that could put stress on your relationship, if you let them, but I believe the positives far outweigh the negatives.

Because both of us live a fitness oriented lifestyle, we’ve really bonded over this experience. I know what she means when she complains about having to eat more chicken (seriously, bleh), and she knows the feeling of being exhausted but hitting the gym anyway because it’s back day. We’re both in better shape that we used to be (obviously) and this means that we will live longer, better lives with each other. Because of all of the training, we’ve got more energy when we’re not in the gym. Mealtime is a breeze – there’s no fighting over “what’s for dinner” in our household! Did I mention that Mere is crazy hot?

In all seriousness, if your husband or wife wants to compete, be prepared. You have to be their rock. You have to support them and be there to listen and encourage them when they are dog tired and crying in the gym because they’re on a low carb day four weeks out from their show questioning why the hell they ever got into this sport. And, if you love them, you will – gladly.

I’m writing this just under a week before Mere’s first show and I want to use this last part to give her some words of encouragement:

You are the strongest, most determined person that I’ve ever known. I’ve seen you put your head down and power through workouts long after most people would have quit. I’ve seen you turn away wine and drinks when we’ve been out celebrating friends’ birthdays. Your dedication and commitment are unending. I’m excited. I’m excited to see you walk the stage next Saturday and to watch you stand in the limelight. I’m excited that I got to share your journey with you and to support you. No matter the outcome, I am proud of you. Now, do what you do best – show up on game day, bring your beast face and kill it. Finally, I love you always.

-SL

As I type this, I cannot believe that 1 week from tomorrow I will be headed to Houston!  Peak Week starts Sunday!!!  I have 1 more fasted cardio session this week, one more lifting session, and a date with the Stairmaster and yoga this weekend.  The worst part is over.  That being said, I thought I’d take tonight’s post to share some of my favorite products, suggestions, and tips that have helped me get through the good and not so good parts of these last 11 weeks.

Everyone’s prep is different, but they usually have a few things in common.  Most athletes will eat 5-6 meals a day consisting of lean proteins, fibrous vegetables, healthy fats, and “good” carbs.  There are a few different philosophies, but most contest preps strictly prohibit alcohol, cheese/ most dairy outside of Greek yogurt, sugars, wheat based carbs, etc… Essentially anything with flour or sugar, or that is processed is out of the diet and not on plan.  Luckily, I knew this before I made the decision to compete, and have always been a healthy eater, maintaining a “clean” diet for the past couple of years.  Think of this as the “uber-clean” diet.  No alcohol?!?  No bread?!?!  NO CHEESE OR BAKED GOODS?!?!  How does one survive?!?  Here’s what got me through it.  The best part—you can use these as part of your healthy lifestyle too!

• VARIETY IS EVERYTHING- If you are thinking about competing and don’t love vegetables, are a vegetarian, and/or a picky eater, you might really want to reconsider thinking about competing.  Prep would be very, very hard f you were picky, considering the limited options you have during prep.  In my case, I LOVE vegetables, and have no problems eating meat of all kinds.  My nutrition plan was comprised (like most are) of lean proteins—chicken, turkey, white fish.   If I had chicken at lunch, I’d have fish or turkey for dinner.  Vegetables can be roasted, steamed, eaten raw, or—my favorite—SPIRALIZED with a spiralizer!  Every Sunday, when I went grocery shopping, I always made sure to come home with plenty of options to choose from for the week

• SPICES AND FLAVOR ARE KEY- I learned very early on that effective use of spices and flavors when I was cooking or meal prepping could completely change the flavor of a particular vegetable or meat. Vinegars (apple cider, balsamic, rice vinegar) are great ways to pack a punch of flavor without adding calories, sodium, or sugar.  FlavorGod seasonings, and Mrs. Dash have been regulars in our pantry for a while—we love FlavorGod Everything Spicy!!

• CRYSTAL LIGHT DROPS- Plain Greek yogurt is my favorite snack.  You pair it with two quick squeezes of the Tropical Coconut Crystal Light drops and boy howdy is it freaking delicious!  No calories, no added sugar.  Yes, artificial sweeteners aren’t the healthiest, but this stuff has helped keep my cravings at bay and gives me variety.  I also like the Tang and Koolaid Grape and Fruit Punch flavors.  Game changer in the yogurt.

• EXTRACTS AND FLAVORINGS- You can add extracts and flavorings (almond, vanilla, etc.) to your casein shakes. Seriously, chocolate casein and mint extract = a Thin Mint Shake!!! Freakin’ delicious! Put coconut extract in with chocolate and BOOM, you’ve got a Samoa!

• WALDEN FARMS PRODUCTS- I think they have fairies that make this stuff calorie free. The caramel dip, pancake syrup (on protein pancakes and in oatmeal!), and strawberry syrup (in my casein shakes!) have all helped me feel like I was cheating while still staying on plan and keeping my coach happy!

• PEANUT BUTTER. Skippy Natural and Peter Pan Natural are the best.  Jiff is for the birds.  Every person who’s ever prepped would agree that the peanut butter is a definite perk.

• PLANNING IS EVERYTHING- Honestly, you have to be really organized to handle this. Your prep life and routine revolves around your workouts and meals.   Before you leave the house every day (weekends included!) you have to think about what food to bring with you, pack your gym bag, grab a change of clothes, and figure out how much time you will need to fit in your workouts.  That’s a lot to think about!  Grocery shopping and meal prep are CRUCIAL.  I always have chicken cooked, and sweet potatoes baked and in the fridge.  If you fail to prepare, you prepare to fail.

• EAT EVERY 2.5-3 HOURS! Personally, I tried to space my morning meals 2.5 hours apart, and the next 4 meals 3 hours apart, and my last one (a casein shake) just before bed time.  I never woke up in the middle of the night hungry, and really wasn’t ever starving.  You just have to stay on top of your meals and EAT when you’re supposed to!

• SUGAR FREE GUM- I think I have about 10 packs in my purse right now. #truestory

• HOT TEA- Caffeine free Peppermint with Stevia was my go-to when I got hungry in between dinner and my Casein shake.

• TEMPERATURE OF MEALS- Food tastes much better served cold or hot. Lukewarm sucks, but I guarantee of the 500+ meals you will eat in a 12 week prep that you will certainly be eating a lot of them on parking lots, and at room temperature.  That said, whenever possible, refrigerate and microwave.

• A SIX PACK BAG OR COOLER- All the cool kids have Six Pack Bags. I also love my Vera Bradley cooler for when I pack less food. Plus, I look like a badass carrying my Six Pack bag around. “What’s that?” say people. I respond, “My food because I’m a badass.  And yes I eat all of it.”

• BUY PROTEIN POWDER THAT TASTES GOOD! My favorites:  Cellucor Red Velvet Cake Batter (whey), Dymatize Elite Casein Chocolate Peanut Butter and Cinnamon Bun.  Optimum Nutrition Chocolate Toffee Fudge (seriously, the best whey I’ve tried—knowing I get it at the end of a workout has helped me power through!) and Cake Batter are both excellent choices for whey too.

• GOOD SUPPLEMENTS COST MONEY- You get what you pay for both in flavor and in quality.

• CUTE WORKOUT CLOTHES- Never too much neon here. God bless Lorna Jane, Nike, and Lululemon.

• MY COUNTDOWN BOARD- I went all Pinterest and hit up the scrapbooking sections and craft stores to make myself a bulletin board full of motivational quotes and some bling. In the middle, I made a tear of sheet to help me count down the days until the show.  I hid little notes on a few pages—things like “keep pushing”, and “work hard”.  Every day I get to look at it and get excited all over again.  I can reuse it for my next one too!

Lately everyone’s been asking what I miss the most, and what I can’t wait to eat or drink after the show.  Disclaimer:  as much as I say I want to eat and drink, I’ve worked my ass off to have this amazing physique, and I DO NOT want to screw it up!!  Reverse dieting will be key after the show to keep my metabolism and body weight in check.  Another good reason to have a coach to walk you through this.  Here’s what I’m looking forward to enjoying!

• A cocktail, champagne, and wine.
• Dinner with my friends and family after the show!
• Mexican food and birthday cake—my 30^th is April 1^st, 3 days after the show, and we’re doing a big party at my favorite Mexican restaurant and have a chocolate cake ordered from Society Bakery. I can’t freaking wait.
• COFFEE CREAMER!!!! The sugar free, fat free CoffeeMate.  Any flavor will do.  Almond milk just sucks as coffee creamer.  It really does.
• Breakfast! Seriously, a biscuit, omelette and pancakes.  AND BACON.  Ohmygod bacon.  Sunday after the show, then right back to my egg whites and oats!
• A burger…maybe Monday??

Seriously though, I don’t want to go to crazy with post-show indulgences and super caloric and fatty foods.  A lot of girls put on pounds QUICKLY after a show because they binge for days and weeks, and I’ve worked too damn hard!!!  Moderation will be key.

Till next time!

-Mere

Let me just start by saying that for me, “this” (meaning clean eating and training) has really become a lifestyle.  When I made the decision to compete, going into it I knew that I wanted to do more than one show, and really wanted to put 110% into this.  It’s more than just a hobby to me, especially now that I’m seeing the payoffs both physically and mentally.  Every day gets me more and more excited to train hard, eat all of my meals, share my knowledge and passion for this with others, and live another day in a healthy, happy body both physically and mentally.  Those of you that know me personally know that I don’t half ass anything, and when I put my mind to something, I really go full throttle.  If anything, I’ve learned that my over-achiever, type-A, uber competitive personality has served me well!  When you compete in this sport, you realize that prep and conditioning your physique to become “show ready” requires tons of time, work, and effort. Plus, you learn the best part about this sport —the longer you do it, the better your physique gets and the better you become as a competitor.  Some people do this for only one show though, and that’s okay too!

A “contest prep” is usually about a 12-week strict program with special nutritional and dietary macros guidelines (protein, fats, and carbs, remember?)  and workouts designed by a coach (although some people do this alone—more on that later) to get one’s body stage ready.  Mine started right after New Year’s, 12 weeks out from my show.  At first, my training and nutrition were very similar to my “off season”, cheat meals included, but I knew it wouldn’t always be that way!  From the beginning, I was concerned about my legs and lower body not being up to par with my upper body (arms, shoulders, and back) but I knew that if I “followed the plan” as prescribed by my coach, I should be A-OK come March 28^th.

My mantra for this entire process, and quite frankly it can be applied to health and fitness in general, has been “One day, one meal, one workout at a time”.  It’s so true—I quickly learned that if I just focused on my next meal (every three hours!), or that day’s workout, the less I would be concerned with pre-show jitters, or focused on what I couldn’t eat or the things that I was “missing out on”..  That being said, if you are even CONSIDERING competing, I would encourage you to give it A LOT of thought and research everything before deciding whether or not it is for you.  This is not for the faint of heart.  Some people do their own prep, and I can’t even IMAGINE, especially as a first-timer, how one would know in the slightest what the hell they were doing!  Having a coach to guide you, support you, and mentor you, is CRUCIAL.  I’m so thankful for mine—I’ve probably asked a million questions since I started working with him, and he’s answered every single one with patience, encouragement, and knowledge.

I was fortunate too, that I have a whole team of Competitors that train with my coach (a lot of ladies, too!) that I could lean on, cheer for, and bond with.  That has been so great!  Having Shane here with me though, has been the biggest part.  Honestly, I probably couldn’t have done this without him.  He has been my rock through this, encouraging me every step of the way, from eating meals with me out of Tupperware in parking lots (I do that a lot!), meal-prepping, high-fiving me in the gym, and taking all of my progress pics, I could not be more blessed to have him by my side. We really are swole mates!

I’ve also been very open with my journey on social media, which for me, has just opened the doors for me to motivate and inspire others, which in turn motivates and inspires me to keep going.  Again, it’s not all rainbows and butterflies.  Yes, the abs and guns are awesome, and yes, I got to have a blast getting all dolled up this weekend for a photo shoot to show off my hot new body, but I’ve also been absolutely busting my ASS in the gym, and have essentially sworn off all restaurants and alcohol for the past three months.  Sometimes I forget the busting the ass part! I knew exactly what I was getting into before I signed up for this because I did lots of research before committing, just as you should.  Your life becomes a never-ending cycle of Train. Eat. Work. Eat. Train. Eat. Sleep. Repeat.  It’s also very expensive and time consuming—also something I knew before I started this journey.  I am also extremely fortunate that I don’t have a crazy work schedule or stressful job to deal with, or kids that needed time and attention.  I am able to work my 40 hours a week, I have a relatively drama free life, and I can really focus on my diet and training.  My efforts have really paid off.

If you’re the type of person that trains hard and eats six times a day already, then your day to day won’t change much if you decide to compete.  What you will learn though, is how much this is a mental and emotional transformation just as much as it is physical.  You can have a coach write down to the T what to eat and drink, how much and when, what to train, how to train, and when to train, but the 24 hours a day 7 days a week of this thing is all you.  No one’s looking over your shoulder to make sure you really only had 32g of peanut butter, and you must have  the self-control necessary to stay on plan, no matter how much Chick-Fil-A and Chipotle are begging you to pay them a visit.  You have to take it one day, one meal, one workout at a time.  In the beginning, the cravings were much harder to resist than they are now.  As much as I’ve talked about what I’m going to eat after the show, I really don’t want to sabotage all of the work that I’ve done and the sacrifices that I’ve already made, so I already know I’ll be right back on plan after a couple of days.  When I can drink again, though, I’m pretty sure my tolerance will be zero all over again!  Red wine and I are planning an awesome reunion.  I do NOT miss the hangovers!

Carb depletion and fasted cardio will make your brain feel very fuzzy and strange.  I speak from experience on this one!  I’ve been working out twice a day for the last 8 weeks, as most competitors do for most of their prep.  I have made lots of sacrifices, don’t see my friends as often as I used to, and have closed down the gym more nights than I can count.  I’ve gotten up to get my fasted cardio in (I have NEVER missed a session, including a post-lifting cardio session, even if it meant tabatas in my living room at 11:30pm) regardless of the weather— I have gone to the gym in snow, sleet, pouring rain, ice, and freezing temperatures.  A workout was never skipped, a rep never missed.  I’ve eaten all of my meals, many of which were cold and boring, and not what I wanted to be eating.  I didn’t have a cheat when it wasn’t allowed, and have followed my plan down to the last letter.  I’ve worked too damn hard to not crush it this last full week of training, since the week before the show or “Peak Week” as we call it, is essentially just light workouts and a science-project of water and carb loading, and dehydration.  As far as the workouts go, only you know when you’ve given it your all. If you want to succeed, you really have to push through that last burning rep and leave the gym feeling like you just kicked your workout’s ass. Every damn day, good or bad.  I absolutely love that feeling.  There really is nothing else like it.

Honestly though, I wouldn’t change a thing.  I’m not sharing this with you to brag or to get you to pat me on the back, but instead I am reflecting on what I’ve accomplished these last three months, and hoping that my journey will inspire you.  Even on my worst day, which included a melt-down in LA Fitness where I literally cried and F-bombed my way through a workout in a sheer state of exhaustion, and drinking sparkling water at my FAVORITE cocktail bar, I have thoroughly enjoyed myself these last 10 weeks.  These last 10 weeks I have perfected my 100 Pandora Stations with the hours I have spent in the gym, and never missed a 1pm Saturday posing class with my coach, and have done more laundry loads full of workout clothes than I care to admit.  I have pushed myself, motivated myself, and challenged myself in ways that I never thought possible and that means more to me than a trophy or medal ever will.  The discipline and pride that I have built are stronger than any muscle will ever be. I cannot thank you all enough for all of your encouragement and support every step of the way.  Every Facebook or Instagram Like, text, hug, Facebook post and message that my friends have given me, have helped carry me through this process.  I can’t wait to make y’all proud when I hit the stage at the Phil, and then do it all again for my next show!

Till next time!

-Mere